Resisting the urge to become bitter

I’m going to be honest here, I have no idea what to write this week. This is me shooting from the hip because I had the kind of week that made me want to start a fight. Like, a real fight. A fist fight! That’s not me. I’m one of the tamest ladies you’ll ever meet (in terms of going all drama, Jersey Shore-ish).

One of the biggest lessons I’ve learned this week is to hold on to this verse:

Phil 4-8 sunrise

and to believe in this:


Because there will be thousands of opportunities over the course of my lifetime to become that bitter, cranky old hag that nobody wants to be around. The one who dwells on the injustices, the disappointments and the mistakes. The one who feels cheated by the system because of increased responsibility and decreased pay. The one who feels unheard because only a few hundred people read her book. The one who is kind to others yet receives rudeness in return.

But let me tell you, I am bound and determined to not be that woman. I have set my sights on a greater purpose and I will go into my 30s, 40s, 50s, 60s, 70s, 80s, 90s, 100s (?!) with a smile. I know who my examples are. I watch closely how they live their lives, and I work very hard – very hard – to emulate. By doing the following:

– Genuine laughter on a daily basis.- Deep breaths
– Picking my battles
– Hugging at least one person every day
– Listening to encouraging music every day
– Letting only encouraging people deeply into my life
– Staying healthy
– Wearing clothes that make me feel good
– Taking my weekend and not feeling guilty for not working
– Cuddling with my dog
– Practicing good hygiene
– Not watching too much TV
– Exercising
– Regular conversations with people who keep me grounded

And I will focus on what is…
True: we are wholly and completely loved.
Noble: doing the right thing.
Just: Good people being given favor in the form of healed sickness and affordable housing.
Pure: a child’s heart, a puppy’s cuddle
Lovely: that sunrise.
Commendable: standing up for each other, serving one another.
Moral excellence: a boy giving back what his father stole.
Praise: the sick becoming cancer-free, finding the right song at the right time, a beautiful sun-shiney day.

I truly, from the bottom of my heart, wish for you a resilient heart that bounces back, resists the negative, and simply enjoys life’s big and small givings.


  1. I applaud your grace filled efforts. I, on the other hand, seem to struggle too often with sadness. My partner and I are at odds over my artistic efforts and I wonder, after twenty years, if we have ever embraced one another’s gifts. Paid work is elusive, leading to the almost daily mention of stress. If only I could successfully re-frame the conversation…this is not the end of the world. It is the beginning of an incredible journey. I am slowly building a portfolio. Some of the work is good. Some are paying me to take photographs of events and for portraits.

    You have published a book. What an amazing achievement. You had a plan and a vision and success! You will continue to write and share your gifts with the world. We, as an artistic community, need to reach out to one another more often- cheer each other on; articulate what we like and offer support. There can be dark and lonely days. I, for one, know that I need to tell you I appreciate you- and need others to prop me up now and again, as well. πŸ™‚

    • That’s so tough. When your work is tied so closely to your heart the situation is a little more complicated. May you be filled with a sense of peace as you struggle… There’s a light in there somewhere; I hope you find it soon!

  2. Yes, “grace-filled” from the comment above is the perfect descriptor for your blog and your spirit. Resisting the urge to become bitter holds the key to everything important in the world — ending a war, reducing violent crime, preventing terrorist attacks.

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