Dear Heartbroken Friend: You are so brave.


Dear Heartbroken Friend,

I see you. I see the tears streaming from your heart, even as you have that smile on your face. I see your sadness, even as you tell me ‘It is what it is’ with a tone that attempts to prove that you do indeed believe that statement. I see your lying eyes, I see your frustration, disappointment, and heartache going in and out of your smiles.

But let me tell you: I think you are so brave.

You have tried and failed at something. You gave it your all. You gave it every morsel you had inside you, and even though it has come to kick you in the butt, you have not given up. Your heart feels weary, your spirit feels shot down. You want to wake up tomorrow and have this be a very bad dream from which you can easily escape.

You hate the sadness and you’re checking off those 5 Stages of Grief like a Monday to-do list, but you are moving. You are not hiding from the world or from yourself. You are saying, “Yes, this hurts. Yes, this sucks. Yes, I want this to be different and I wish I could change this.” But you are also saying, “This will not beat me. I am not strong enough on my own, but that’s what my faith is for. I am not strong enough on my own, but that’s what my friends are for. I might not believe all the good stuff right now, but I know I will someday.” Maybe you don’t think you’re saying those things, but by your moving forward with your day-to-day living, you are saying those things. You’ve kicked into survival mode, which is better than dying mode, because at least you’re on your way to something better.

You are so brave.

Yes, your heart is broken. You’ve been torn down to nothing by a circumstance you cannot control. You have a pretty big heartache obstacle to step over. Yet here you are, taking one step at a time toward healing, toward moving on, toward life.

You are so brave.

You don’t feel it and you don’t think it. But believe you me, when I look at you, even though I see the sadness, heartache, frustration, and grief, above all, I see bravery. I see a strength and a resiliency that inspires me. I see courage and I see grace. I see a heart that tried with all its might, got kicked down, but isn’t willing to sit on the sidelines forever.

Friend, give yourself some credit. Let God do some of the work. It’s okay to be sad for now, but keep believing, keep knowing that this is temporary, and that your brave and courageous spirit that tried in the first place will rise again.

Because you are just so very brave.


*Inspired by this HuffPost Parents article and some very dear friends who are hurting on the inside and yet are showing incredible bravery.

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